Put down the electronics and do more of the 4 "C's"

Connect.
Contribute.
Cope.
Cook.

In the spirit of the last two months of the year and the holidays, especially so for this year, 2020, it bears reminding that we can all do more to increase our happiness, and not our pleasure. When we meet up with our family and friends these last couple of months, please do try to limit screen time and be more present in face-to-face time. What we want to do is increase our levels of serotonin and oxytocin. We want to decrease our levels of cortisol and dopamine.

Connect with your family and friends as best you can, in person. Look at them in the eyes and listen intently. Respond accordingly and thoughtfully. Slow down your thought processes and pay attention to the person you are conversing with. Genuinely be interested in what they have to say. Relate to them as best as you can. If you both are willing, then maintain physical contact; in order of importance and degree of physical contact: hugs, high-fives, and fist-bumps. In these moments of contact is when serotonin is released in each other’s bodies. This hormone and signaling molecule is important in creating happiness.

Contribute to others, not only to your family and friends, but also strangers. Like the Love Language “Acts of Service,” contributing to others goes a long way in creating happiness as well. Give more of your time, and effort to others. Donate physical resources that others can use, as well. Giving more of yourself without expecting anything in return is the idea.

Cope to life’s stressors by prioritizing sleep and self-care. More sleep means more time your body gets to spend in its restorative state. The more time your body is in sleep, the less time your body is being affected by the stress hormone cortisol. Really staying focused and in the moment when you are staying active and moving help you cope and withstand life’s stressors as well. Slow breathing through your nose whenever you are not eating or speaking will be a key behavior to learn and apply in order to cope better, as well. Stay away from electronics and screens as much as you can. This will help you decrease your body’s exposure to dopamine and cortisol. Bright lights especially in cell phones, tablets, computer screens, and televisions can keep your brain active into the evenings when you need to sleep. Seeing all the negative talk and news through your electronic devices will dampen your ability to cope. Stress and depression are huge results from that.

Strive to cook whole, unprocessed food for others, like your family and friends. Are you able to do that for strangers, too? This yet another way to enact the love language “Acts of Service.” Not only you are providing great nutrition to others, but you are helping someone feel better by reducing their stress in thinking about what to eat and even about the process of cooking it. You and they will be ultimately more happy. The less sugar the food you will cook for yourself and others, the less of a dopamine hit your bodies will take, as well. Dopamine gives you more pleasure temporarily, but not more happiness long term.

Try these 4 “C’s” out more in the next couple of months and see how much of all that can you adopt for months and years moving forward!

Check out Dr. Robert Lustig’s book The Hacking of the American Mind to read more about the 4 “C’s” in depth, and this cool infographic: